Letting go does not mean to push away or suppress. True letting go is a process of integration and healing.
Letting go can be a misleading statement because it gives the impression of separation. By integrating a situation that involves you, another person, or a circumstance in life, means to come to terms with it. We can only come to terms with something when we understand it.
When we understand the purpose of our life experiences, we are able to accept them; thereby releasing our emotional attachment. Learning to embrace our issues in this way allows us to take them within ourselves and integrate them.
Once our emotions are understood and integrated our judgments about ourselves and others begin to dissolve. Where there is clarity and understanding, problems cannot germinate.
What we see on the outside of ourselves is a reflection of what is happening on the inside. Interacting with others is always a way of interacting with oneself. When interaction brings up feelings within us that we do not like, we should search inside to see why this is occurring. We should view others in our lives as our mirrors.
Many people create emotional isolation by distancing themselves from others. Using the outside as a reflection of the inside, finding ourselves isolated and disoriented shows us how we are feeling on the inside.
Understanding that the only real problem in your life is you, allows you to realize the truth of who you are. Only through thorough self-examination can emotions and feelings be healed. This is true problem solving.
Our accepted beliefs, habits and behaviors¾our inner walls¾all play a part in who we are. Take for example the critical part of self, who loves to run rampant. This part continually judges and criticizes self and others. This kind of behavior is very often quite destructive. This behavior leads to an out-of-balance, superhuman, perfectionist complex.
It seems to have become the norm to single out what is imperfect about another or oneself rather than identifying what is unique and special. This commonly leads to pettiness and competition, disrespect and dishonor.
We can require that others honor us in the same way that we honor our self, only by treating them as we wish to be treated. We find it is much easier to accept others when we like and accept ourselves. Being critical and judgmental are roadblocks in the path of learning to love.
As we become honest with ourselves and reflect our own attitudes and actions, we see the mirrors that others play in our life.
In understanding why we feel the way we do about our past, we begin to let go. By transmuting pain and sadness into love, we become loving. By changing how we think and view life, we become open-minded. Realizing that one can only change his or herself rather than the world around them alleviates the stress of what you cannot do.
Letting go is the process of fully accepting something as it is with no need to change it. Only through a spiritual perception can we understand the issues faced in life and come to terms with them. Openly embracing life and its lessons with an open and loving heart allows this new perception to emerge within us. This is letting go.
We must be able to forgive and accept our mistakes before we can change them. Embracing with love always brings about the desired change. This is the universal paradox upon which all life is based.